Slow down, Feel, Be...

 I have been sitting here staring at this blog for a month now with no idea of what to post about. It was not that I didn't have any idea's, it was that I have a million ideas running through my head at all times and to narrow it down to one was a daunting task. Finally after debating it for weeks on end and drafting ten possible first posts, I know exactly what to write. This simple message from a fellow facebooker inspired my very first blog post, which is hopefully the first of many.

‎"I really am your gift. I am not just a little person who needs to be "raised" and taught, and taken to activities....I came to the people in my life to bring a message: slow down. Feel. Be. Over and over again. When you do, you will notice immediately, that I am not an obstacle to your work, or inconvenience to your daily life. Instead, you will come to appreciate my honesty, humor, presence and love."-- Bruce Scott

To say that life is busy as a mom is the understatement of the century. Life is busy, hectic, and overwhelming and that's on a good day. I never understood my parents telling me that my growing up went by so fast. I remember thinking "yeah right, went by fast for who, because to me it was forever", but as my son grows up I can finally appreciate what they meant.  Not too long ago I wrote this in my journal...

"It amazes me how fast the days and weeks are passing by. Part of me wants to slow it down just enough that I can take each moment in and appreciate that it is another minute to lock away in my memory of life for I cannot have it back. You are growing and changing so fast and you are already so amazing"

...I guess that sums up how I feel about time passing by. Sometimes I look at my little man and think where did 3 years go, how did you grow from a brand new life into a busy pre-schooler so quickly. It happens right before our eyes, as moms we get a front row seat to watching these little lives bud, and bloom, and grow, and yet add in all the other responsibilities of everyday and it seems as though we get the least time to appreciate it. Add in dishes, laundry, cooking, cleaning, working, and that doesn't leave many hours in a day to just be, to just slow down, to just simply appreciate the little moments that our children give us for all that they are worth.

As I read the quote on facebook the other day I will admit I got a little teary thinking about how truly blessed I am with the gift of my son. I started to think about how sometimes life gets in the way of our appreciation of our "gifts" and we occasionally take them for granted, at least I know I am guilty of this. I know I don't mean to, I thank God every night for Trentyn, I thank him every morning for giving me another day to love him, and I thank him for trusting me with the beautiful little light that is my son.

 I also started to think how in the hardest moments I sometimes feel less then appreciated as a mom, which I'm certain comes with the job description, but does it come with the job description of being a child...I am going to have to go with a resounding NO on this one. So I'm making it a priority not only for myself but for my child, to slow down just a little bit. To stop rushing so much and realize that it truly is the little moments that matter and that if we let them all pass us by because we are too busy trying to fold laundry and make dinner, it's our loss for we can't have them back. The moments are there only for a moment, the amazing innocence that beams from our children changes every day, the pureness and honesty of their words is all too soon gone....but the dinner and the laundry, it's all still going to be there. Years from now we arent going to look back and think wow I'm sure glad I folded the laundry and got dinner on in time, we are going to look back and think of the joys we felt enjoying our children grow, years from now we will be glad we stopped to take in the memory. 

So here is my challenge from now on...

I'll remember to enjoy the gift of watching my child grow, and learn, and change while it's happening... I'll slow down for a minute every day and appreciate that exact moment... I'll allow my kid to be a kid,  and  not expect him to be anything else. I'll expect less of myself in my every day responsibilities and give more of myself to the joy of motherhood... I'll appreciate my kid for all that he is. I'll enjoy being a mom instead of rushing through it... I'll SLOW DOWN, FEEL, BE...every day.

 To my amazing gift...

Trentyn,

Sometimes mommy gets too busy, sometimes my life feels so rushed, sometimes I forget to embrace all the little things you do.

I making you a promise now, to SLOW DOWN, to FEEL, to BE.

To appreciate you every day for the incredible gift that you are.

I'm going to remember every day to tell you that you are my gift from God.

To tell you every day that you are amazing and innocent, and pure.

To encourage you every day with praise and love to keep shining your light as bright as you do.

I'll stop expecting so much from you and let you be just 3, for as you tell me daily your still "just a kid" and your only a kid for a little while.

I want you to grow up knowing that I delighted in all the things you accomplished.

That I admire your ability to offer the world the love of God without even knowing your doing it.

That I am captivated by the beauty of your soul each and every day.

I want you to grow up knowing how thankful I am that God trusted me with you.

That raising you is the most important and gratifying thing I'll ever do in this life.

That you are teaching me so much more about love, and life, then I could ever teach you.

You are mommy's truest angel and forever friend, and you hold the biggest piece of my heart

You light up my world with every minute that I get to spend with you.

Never stop being who you are because God made you perfect in every way.

I loved you yesterday

I love you today

I'll love you tomorrow
and I'll Love you always.

Xoxo,

Mommy